Just a decimal point April 29, 2009
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in polo, science.Tags: polo, science
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I am late in commenting on this, but no doubt everyone has heard about the death of the 21 polo ponies down in Wellington, FL before the US Open. The current findings suggest that the horses died of selenium toxicity – the ponies were on a regimen that included injecting Biodyl before the start of a match and as it has not been approved by the FDA, the team contracted a compound pharmacy to make a similar supplement. While the pharmacy has acknolwedged that they made a mistake, one of the Scienceblogs suggests that it was probably a decimal point error.
This tragedy highlights a few things – first, it makes clear the importance of basic math and science skills. I feel that it is easy to brush off a misplaced decimal point. I know on exams if I make a decimal point error, I don’t feel too bad because I got the answer “mostly right”. However, being “mostly right” in some disciplines is not good enough. There is an old poem that I cannot remember the name of, but part of it goes as follows: “Good enough, it’s good enough / My child beware of good enough / It isn’t made of stearling stuff”. It’s easy to be sloppy and to be lazy, but things like this serve as a reminder of how one little mistake – the placement of a dot, in this case – can have far reaching consequences.
Another thing that this brings up is the lack of a clear drug policy as outlined by the USPA. While I know that the injection of high performance drugs really isn’t a problem in polo, I can’t help but feel that there needs to be some statement that the injection of compounds that are found to be harmful to the horse should be illegal. In polo, it is not just the horse that is being judged – the talent of the player and teamwork are significant to winning a chukker at any level. That is why giving bute (basically, the horse equivalent of aspirin) to horses before a match is legal. You are not forcing the animal to be in pain but rather are making sure that he or she does not suffer. It does not make the horse perform above his or her level but rather allows the horse to play at its level. Experienced horses are going to, especially, need this as we all know that the aches and pains people feel increase as we age and a horse is happier, I feel, doing the thing that it loves rather than sitting in a pasture. That’s not to say that you should ride a dead lame horse, however – I always like to think about how I would feel if I was hurting and whether or not I would want to work and apply that same sort of logic (though removing any sort of anthropomorphization) to the horse.
It was a very sad thing to have happen and I am sorry that anyone had to go through losing their horses in this fashion.
The Importance of Polo February 5, 2009
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school, polo.add a comment
As I sit here, hoping that the rain holds off this evening, I’ve come to realize time and time again how important polo is to my life. It brings me happiness and acts as a constant in my life when everything else is being turned upside down. I don’t know what it is – I can get so frustrated, at times, but the worst day out on the field (or in the arena) is better than anything else in the world to me. It’s a combination of being on a horse, the social aspect, and participating on a sport that requires so much concentration that it’s not possible to think about anything else. I may just be a low goal-hack but when I play, everything else except the game falls away.
I definitely could use a dose of ‘polo therapy’ after a typical grad school exam that’s more about what you don’t know than demonstrating knowledge. To say it came out of left-field is an understatement – everyone in the class (literally) felt that way.
I’ve gotten this California thing out of my system for real this time. I’m tired of the constant ups and downs and just want some stability back (polo at the moment isn’t providing that).
New Year, New Direction January 8, 2009
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in anxiety, graduate school, polo.Tags: anxiety, graduate school, life, mentors, polo
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It seems that with the horror that was fall quarter behind me, a very relaxing winter break, and easier classes this quarter ( so far) I am in a much better mood. Graduate school has a lot of ups and downs and with the funding situation as it is, I’m just going to have to ride it out. It’s more about grit and sticking it out and knowing that no matter what happens, I will get my degree.
With that out of the way, I have decided to move on and talk about one of my other main interests: polo. It started as a way to pull me out of minor depression during my junior year and has evolved into something that has become a huge part of my life. I have always loved horseback riding and started out at a hunter/jumper barn though because I never owned my own horse, there was only so far I could go. Showing wasn’t for me, as it was, so perhaps it was for the better. After trying the equestrian team, I quit riding for about two years and started polo as a way to not only get me back into riding, but to get me out of whatever place I had found myself. I was just okay at the collegiate level and I’m being generous there. I’m not sure I improved much at all, but it gave me my start and for that I will always be forever grateful. The people I met were also amazing and that’s such a huge part of why my entire outlook as an undergrad started to get better as I progressed through my junior and my senior year.
This past summer, though, was a major turning point. After graduating from my undergraduate institution, I managed to get myself discouraged and considered hanging up my mallets for a while. I honestly didn’t think I’d ever play polo again, but a grooming opportunity opened up and I just couldn’t ever, ever turn something like that down. It’s always been a dream of mine to work with horses and this truly is the best job I have ever had. Not only did I get somewhat better at playing (I’m just a B both in the arena and on the grass, so I still have a ways to go!) but I met people who care about one another and look out for each other. I feel like they’re a second family to me and leaving that to go to graduate school was way harder than I ever imagined.
I’m still working on finding a “fit” out here. The collegiate group is fun, but it’s not exactly what I’m looking for. I have another place to try coming up this weekend and I’m definitely looking forward to that. Maybe I’m too picky, but it’s going to take a lot to find something that will ever measure up to the experience I had this past summer. I think that because polo aided in overcoming my anxiety disorder to the point where I very rarely get panic attacks anymore, I was also afraid that I’d lose some of the ground that I had gained. While I can never go back to the place that I was when I first started getting panic attacks, it does feel a bit like part of the rug under my feet has gotten tugged.
I also too need to stop being so hard on myself – as my patron once told me, “go out there with a big smile on your face and ride your heart out”. That, this year, is going to be my goal for both polo and life. I think a lot of life lessons carry over from the field into “real” life. It’s funny, but while I’m out there I can’t think of anything else but the game. I think that’s why it appeals to me so much – no matter what’s happening in my life, I can just let go. I probably place too much importance on one sport, but I think it illustrates how one person (okay, well, two…er, three…um, actually, make it all of the polo people and their families) can really impact your life. I’ll have to remember that when I get down in my grad student funk thinking that what I’m doing has absolutely no relevance (well, okay, some of it is pretty pointless).
Oh, and another one of my goals is to swing earlier. There’s always that.
End of the quarter… December 17, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school.Tags: chemistry, funding, grades, graduate school
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After a few days of, well, not doing much besides sleeping and waiting anxiously for my physical-organic grade to be posted, I finally got an answer this morning. I pulled off a B, which is good enough! I will not have to re-take the class and this means that there are no more chemistry courses in my future unless I so choose. I am still waiting on my statistics and my ecology in agriculture grades, but really the only one I cared about was (finally) posted and I can rest easy knowing that I did fine.
The problem of funding, however, still looms over my head. After being told that the funding for my (potential) summer project was no longer available, I went through the list of professors again to see if I had missed anyone. A quick check revealed that I had talked to everyone doing research that I was interested in and either a) they had no funding or b) they are not the type of people that I could work for on the basis of personality, work style, etc. I have begun to contact other institutions with the hope that somewhere someone has some funding (or there are TA jobs available) for research that involves natural products as it applies to foods. I have made one contact and I may end up back where I got my undergraduate degree, but we’ll see where this all goes. It’s not easy right now, that’s for sure.
Funding woes December 9, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school.Tags: economy, funding, graduate school
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It seems that the tough economic times have really hit sources of funding for (new) graduate students pretty hard. People are staying in labs because they don’t want to leave and enter the job market (which is a smart move, in my opinion), but that can leave some of us new kids who came in without a lab hung out to dry. I say ‘new kids’, but I’m the only one in my cohort who came in without a firm commitment to a lab. I understand that there are projects out there, but there is either a) no funding to do them or b) they are outside my field of interest. I’m going to have to be flexible, I know, but I don’t think doing a project that doesn’t interest me solely for the sake of learning the techniques is going to make me very happy.
What makes the situation more difficult is that oh, say, a few weeks ago I was told that funding was “very likely” for a project in Professor B’s lab. Now, I was very excited about this project and had been chatting with my scientist Dad about it pretty much every time that I talked to him. However, I received an e-mail the other day from Professor B stating that the company wasn’t willing to fund me and that funding was always “very unlikely”. What? Excuse me? I’m sorry, but that was not what you told me when I met with you. In addition to that, she also took on another graduate student instead of letting me oh, I don’t know, work on another project and her lab is now full. She was not apologetic at all in her e-mail despite being very excited about meeting with me initially. I know it’s nothing personal and my situation stems more from the fact that she took on someone in her department rather than myself who is in an interdisciplinary graduate group that Professor B is a part of. I’m just very frustrated because when I decided to come here for graduate school, I did so because the people I talked to had multiple projects that were funded. Now, because of the economy, these projects are no more and I’m not receiving any help when it comes to finding someone who does have money or room in there lab. It’s just a bad situation for everyone right now.
There exists a strong possibility that I may have to leave this school and go elsewhere. However, right now, I have finals to concentrate on…
Motivation December 2, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school.Tags: goals, graduate school, teachers
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Terrible professors are all the motivation I need to keep going. Sometimes, I just need to remind myself that part of my wanting to teach is that I don’t want students to go through what I went through.
*sighs* November 19, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school.Tags: chemistry, graduate school, life
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…I wonder what the options are for people who like science but maybe, just maybe, aren’t cut out for grad school…
Physical-organic chemistry sucks.
Under the Microscope – Re: What Was Your Most Exciting Science Class in High School? November 13, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in women in science.Tags: chemistry, geoscience, science olympiad, teachers
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This post was made to the website Under the Microscope, a blogging site that allows women in STEM to share their stories about how they got interested in science, their careers, and ultimately to encourage others (especially women) to pursue a life of science.
The two science classes I enjoyed most in high school were geoscience and chemistry, hands down. I was lucky enough to have two great teachers that made all the difference in the world when it came to making the subject matter more exciting.
I didn’t have the greatest experience in junior high – while I was interested in school, I wasn’t exactly a stellar student and my science teachers didn’t recommend me for honors science classes in high school. There was one I felt who would have encouraged me, but she was never my teacher and I unfortunately didn’t get the chance to really meet her. However, my parents and I both agreed that because I was interested in it, I should go for honors geoscience anyway. I am so glad that I did because I do not doubt that the teachers I met in high school influenced the path that I took.
My geoscience teacher was so excited about science – we ended up spending an entire semester (instead of a quarter) on astronomy because the class was enjoying studying it. We built bottle rockets, earthquake “proof” buildings, solar powered rovers, and did all sorts of interesting labs. In addition, this particular teacher taught chemistry and just for fun, he’d do chemistry demos before some of the lectures. I think that he really embodied the “joy of science” and passed along the notion that science is really all about the beginners mind and discovery. I credit this class with first introducing me to the concept of climate change and I have been interested in the impacts of global warming ever since. More importantly, I also gained confidence from this class; I could more than make it at the honors level and because of how much I liked this class, I really started to feel that a life of science was the one for me.
The next year, I was lucky enough to have a chemistry teacher that was just as excited about teaching as my geoscience teacher was. Not only was this particular teacher the new coach of the school’s Science Olympiad team (which I think thanks to his enthusiasm, really encouraged us and we went to Nationals every year once he started coaching), but he brought that same enthusiastic attitude to his classes and made chemistry seem that much more interesting. While we did the “typical” high school chemistry labs, we also made soap, ice cream, and tie-dyed shirts. I was lucky enough to have the same teacher for AP Chem and while I only made a 3 on the test, I think it’s because the class didn’t teach to the exam and was more about what we would take away from it. It certainly made my first year of chemistry in college that much easier, that’s for sure.
There were ups and downs, like there are with all things – I didn’t always do so great on exams or homework assignments, but the enthusiasm and the encouragement of those two teachers always remained constant. It’s amazing how much a good teacher in a subject can make all the difference in the world; my current PhD track in agricultural & environmental chemistry is proof of that.
Original post: http://www.underthemicroscope.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=185&Itemid=44
Under the Microscope – Re: What got you hooked on science? November 9, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in women in science.Tags: chemistry, parents, science olympiad, teachers, women in science
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This post was made to the website Under the Microscope, a blogging site that allows women in STEM to share their stories about how they got interested in science, their careers, and ultimately to encourage others (especially women) to pursue a life of science.
Grades and their emotional impact… November 6, 2008
Posted by OffsideElement (spits) in graduate school.Tags: comics, exams, graduate school
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It’s no secret (though I’d like it to be) – I bombed my chem exam. Well, not completely, I suppose, but I did poor enough that I had reason to be concerned. Don’t ask me what happened during that exam because I simply don’t know. I had no problem with the practice exams and I understood the material, but for whatever reason this past Monday I just had issues. It’s never fun to not perform up to what you know you’re capable of, but this hit me especially hard. I felt physically sick yesterday and didn’t want to leave my apartment. However, I had the chance to meet with my professor today and was told that all is not lost. If it was just a bad day, I need to just “put it behind me and not worry”. I’ll just have to keep working hard and know that this was just simply a “glitch”.
However, I think it’s interesting how much a grade can influence my mood. I don’t know if this is something common to graduate students and our general nature to be over-achievers, but the fact that I didn’t do well on an exam completely and utterly derailed me yesterday. When there are so many other things going on in the world and so many worse things that could happen, it’s amazing just how much of an impact an exam can have. Maybe it’s because it’s a personal experience and I don’t like to lose the “academic game”, but it still seems like too much emotion went into “grieving” over a bad exam grade.
I think Jorge Cham of PHD Comics has wise words for all of us grad students to remember:
